it should proably explained good and early that we at the offices of casual friday do not subscribe to any particular suspicion group. the issue doesn’t even have to really do with belief systems, it is a deep seated indifference to the practice of religion in both the institutional and personal arenas. to put it simply, we could really give a fuck.
with that laid out nice and clear, despite our non-religous stance we can fully get behind easter. it’s one of our favorite holidays actually. it could be argued that easter has it all: it provides us with an occasion to wear a wicker crown of thorns around all day, brunch centered activities, the hunky jesus contest at dolores park, and honestly, it’s a zombie holiday, in that, you know, jesus “came back from the dead” and all… it’s all very good stuff.
one of our most foretelling memories also is an easter one. when we were but little girls in hawaii, our family was still occasionally taking half hearted stabs at catholosism. one particular easter, when we were very small, probably around three little years of age, our mother and grandmother escorted us bedecked in pretty dresses to a church. our memory is dim of many facts, namly owing to the great expanse of time spreading between then and now. we do remember a deep boredom, one that tends to be reserved for horrible oddesys, like 16 hour long greyhound rides to portland or endless car rides with people you don’t particularly like in a car with no working radio. so here we are little and bored, outside the sun is shining and in the distance there is a playground, devoid of children. both swings unoccupied… we fussed, we figited, we bothered our mother to let us go and play only to be shushed. so we took matters into our own hands, which is really the best way to get things done right and proper. we bit our mother. we bit her arm as hard as we could. all of our sharp pearly baby teeth closing down on flesh. our mother escorted us out of curch rapidly, we don’t remember what happened next probably a scolding, the devil’s playground not even an option. we were never taken back to church again. we would like to claim a ghost of an inkling about our undeniably non tendencies, but really it was probably more beligerence than orical. but it makes you think, perhaps if cassandra had used teeth maybe people would have listened to her portents a little closer.
with that said, may all your easter eggs be found, may your jesus’ be hunky, and may your scones turn out perfectly. oh, and don’t forget to leave a carrot out for the easter bunny.
